To Be 6 Again...
A man was sitting on the edge of the bed,observing his wife, looking at herself in the mirror. S ince her birthday was not far off he asked what she'd like to have for her Birthday.
"I'd like to b e six again", she replied,still looking in the mirror.
On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early,made her a nice big bowl of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme park.
What a day!
He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster, everything therewas.
Five hours later they staggered out of the themepark. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down.
He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake.
Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop,and her favorite candy, M&M's. What a fabulous adventure!
Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.
He leaned overhis wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, "Well Dear, what was it likebeing six again??"
Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed.
"I meant my dress size, dumb ass!"
The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is gonna get it wrong
.SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE
CHOW
NOW IF YOU DON"T THINK THIS IS AMUSSING!!!! WELL GOOD LUCK TO YOU!!!!FRAN
Sunday, October 21, 2007
HI ~~~~~thought you would like to see this one,,, send it on to some one else by just copying and pasting,,,
My media player didn't play the background music, but the message is loud and clear anyway!
Click on 'years ago' and watch a beautiful story. It scrolls by itself after you start it. I hope you enjoy it!
Years ago
Enjoy!!! Have a great day,,, SMILE ,,,, Fran
My media player didn't play the background music, but the message is loud and clear anyway!
Click on 'years ago' and watch a beautiful story. It scrolls by itself after you start it. I hope you enjoy it!
Years ago
Enjoy!!! Have a great day,,, SMILE ,,,, Fran
Saturday, October 20, 2007
Hi how is every one? all is well I hope! I thought this was a taste of life and you might want to read it,,, ENJOY!!!!
On the first day of school our Professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.
I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being.
She said, "Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?"
I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she gave me a giant
Squeeze.
"Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked.
She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married,ad have a couple of kids."
"No seriously," I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.
"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!" she told me.
After class we walked to the student union building a n d shared a chocolate Milkshake.
We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop, I was always mesmerized listening to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.
Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went.
She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up.
At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor.
Frustrated and a little embarrassed,
She leaned into the microphone and simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so jittery, I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know."
As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, "We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing. There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. You have to laugh and find humor every day. You've got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die. We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it! There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up. If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty eight. Anybody can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change. Have no regr! ets. The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets."
She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose."
She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.
At the year's end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago.
One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.
Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can possibly be.
When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your friends and family, they'll really enjoy it!
These Words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.
REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL.
We make a Living by what we get, We make a Life by what we give.
God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage. If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.
"Good friends are like stars........You don't always see them, but you know they are always there.
On the first day of school our Professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.
I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being.
She said, "Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?"
I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she gave me a giant
Squeeze.
"Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked.
She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married,ad have a couple of kids."
"No seriously," I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.
"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!" she told me.
After class we walked to the student union building a n d shared a chocolate Milkshake.
We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop, I was always mesmerized listening to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.
Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went.
She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up.
At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor.
Frustrated and a little embarrassed,
She leaned into the microphone and simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so jittery, I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know."
As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, "We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing. There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. You have to laugh and find humor every day. You've got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die. We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it! There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up. If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty eight. Anybody can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change. Have no regr! ets. The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets."
She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose."
She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.
At the year's end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago.
One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.
Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can possibly be.
When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your friends and family, they'll really enjoy it!
These Words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.
REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL.
We make a Living by what we get, We make a Life by what we give.
God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage. If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.
"Good friends are like stars........You don't always see them, but you know they are always there.
Saturday, October 06, 2007
SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT!!!!!!
A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day,
Drinking iced tea and visiting with her Mother. As
They talked about life, about marriage, about the
Responsibilities of life and the obligations of
Adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her
Glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance
Upon her daughter.
'Don't forget your Sisters,' she advised, swirling
The tea leaves to the bottom of her glass. 'They'll
Be more important as you get older. No matter how
Much you love your husband, no matter how much you
Love the children you may have, you are still going
To need Sisters. Remember to go places with them now
And then; do things with them.'
'Remember that 'Sisters' means ALL the women...
Your girlfriends, your daughters, and all your other
Women relatives too. 'You'll need other women. Women
Always do.'
What a funny piece of advice!' the young woman
Thought. Haven't I just gotten married?
Haven't I just joined the couple-world? I'm now a
Married woman, for goodness sake! A grownup! Surely
My husband and the family we may start will be all I
Need to make my life worthwhile!'
But she listened to her Mother. She kept contact
With her Sisters and made more women friends each
Year. As the years tumbled by, one after another,
She gradually came to understand that her Mom really
Knew what she was talking about. As time and nature
Work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman,
Sisters are the mainstays of her life.
After more than 70 years of living in this world,
Here is what I've learned:
THIS SAYS IT ALL:
Time passes.
Life happens.
Distance separates.
Children grow up.
Jobs come and go.
Love waxes and wanes.
Men don't do what they're supposed to do.
Hearts break.
Parents die.
Colleagues forget favors.
Careers end.
BUT.........
Sisters are there, no matter how much time and how
Many miles are
Between you. A girl friend is never farther away
Than needing her can reach.
When you have to walk that lonesome valley and you
Have to walk it by yourself, the women in your life
Will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on,
Praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on
Your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the
Valley's' end.
Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk
Beside you...Or come in and carry you out.
Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters,
Daughters-in-law, sisters, sisters-in-law, Mothers,
Grandmothers, aunties, nieces, cousins, and extended
Family, all bless our life!
The world wouldn't be the same without women, and
Neither would I. When we began this adventure called
Womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or
Sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we
Would need each other.
Every day, we need each other still. Pass this on
To all the women who help make your life meaningful.
I just did. Short and very sweet:
There are more than twenty angels in this world.
Ten are peacefully sleeping on clouds. Nine are
Playing. And one is reading her email at this
Moment.
Happy days! To you all, FRAN
Don't break this; it's working
A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day,
Drinking iced tea and visiting with her Mother. As
They talked about life, about marriage, about the
Responsibilities of life and the obligations of
Adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her
Glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance
Upon her daughter.
'Don't forget your Sisters,' she advised, swirling
The tea leaves to the bottom of her glass. 'They'll
Be more important as you get older. No matter how
Much you love your husband, no matter how much you
Love the children you may have, you are still going
To need Sisters. Remember to go places with them now
And then; do things with them.'
'Remember that 'Sisters' means ALL the women...
Your girlfriends, your daughters, and all your other
Women relatives too. 'You'll need other women. Women
Always do.'
What a funny piece of advice!' the young woman
Thought. Haven't I just gotten married?
Haven't I just joined the couple-world? I'm now a
Married woman, for goodness sake! A grownup! Surely
My husband and the family we may start will be all I
Need to make my life worthwhile!'
But she listened to her Mother. She kept contact
With her Sisters and made more women friends each
Year. As the years tumbled by, one after another,
She gradually came to understand that her Mom really
Knew what she was talking about. As time and nature
Work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman,
Sisters are the mainstays of her life.
After more than 70 years of living in this world,
Here is what I've learned:
THIS SAYS IT ALL:
Time passes.
Life happens.
Distance separates.
Children grow up.
Jobs come and go.
Love waxes and wanes.
Men don't do what they're supposed to do.
Hearts break.
Parents die.
Colleagues forget favors.
Careers end.
BUT.........
Sisters are there, no matter how much time and how
Many miles are
Between you. A girl friend is never farther away
Than needing her can reach.
When you have to walk that lonesome valley and you
Have to walk it by yourself, the women in your life
Will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on,
Praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on
Your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the
Valley's' end.
Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk
Beside you...Or come in and carry you out.
Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters,
Daughters-in-law, sisters, sisters-in-law, Mothers,
Grandmothers, aunties, nieces, cousins, and extended
Family, all bless our life!
The world wouldn't be the same without women, and
Neither would I. When we began this adventure called
Womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or
Sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we
Would need each other.
Every day, we need each other still. Pass this on
To all the women who help make your life meaningful.
I just did. Short and very sweet:
There are more than twenty angels in this world.
Ten are peacefully sleeping on clouds. Nine are
Playing. And one is reading her email at this
Moment.
Happy days! To you all, FRAN
Don't break this; it's working
Monday, October 01, 2007
Hello,, every one,,, sorry I have not been updating my blog,, but I have been very busy with the Etsy.com web site putting hand made things on there to sell. so far not much action! but, I am tring not to be disappointed,, they say it takes time,, and I have pleanty of that!!!
but here is a web site you might want to go to , and put a smile on your face. Be sure to turn your speakers on!
http://www.frontiernet.net/~jimdandy/specials/friend/friend.html
Enjoy and SMILE,, and come see me at
Etsy.com put ____ the wright place____ in the sellers place in the drop down for the search.
Have a wonderful day,,
LOVE THOSE PHILADELPHIA ~~~PHILLYS!!!
GO PHLLY GO!!!!! GOOD LUCK TO THOSE GUYS, THEY DID ONE HECK OF A JOB!
but here is a web site you might want to go to , and put a smile on your face. Be sure to turn your speakers on!
http://www.frontiernet.net/~jimdandy/specials/friend/friend.html
Enjoy and SMILE,, and come see me at
Etsy.com put ____ the wright place____ in the sellers place in the drop down for the search.
Have a wonderful day,,
LOVE THOSE PHILADELPHIA ~~~PHILLYS!!!
GO PHLLY GO!!!!! GOOD LUCK TO THOSE GUYS, THEY DID ONE HECK OF A JOB!
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Friday, August 31, 2007
Hope you all have a safe and happy Labor day weekend,,
I was sent this web site aand thought you might like to see it also,,
turn on your speakers,
This is really the truth of the way lfe goes,, I think.
But , what the heck to I know I'm a a Mother !!!! (laughing)
Check out the site .
take care Fran
http://www.lindwa.com/Train.htm
I was sent this web site aand thought you might like to see it also,,
turn on your speakers,
This is really the truth of the way lfe goes,, I think.
But , what the heck to I know I'm a a Mother !!!! (laughing)
Check out the site .
take care Fran
http://www.lindwa.com/Train.htm
Labels:
enjoy your week end,
get a laugh,
train
Friday, August 24, 2007


Hello to all of you that stop by here once in a while.
I know I am not one of those Blogs that give you a sexy thing or some goofy stuff, just a few jokes I think or good. So to those of you who do stop by "I hope you enjoy!"
But, have found what is to me the greatest web site. For years now I have been a crafter, I paint, sew, do scupltures with clay, have done arrangments at Christmas with pine cones.
But, have found what is to me the greatest web site. For years now I have been a crafter, I paint, sew, do scupltures with clay, have done arrangments at Christmas with pine cones.
Well just all kinds of thing, always seeing something and thinking "what could I do with that" . Any way , this means I have so many thing around here , I have not sold. (great things) Craft shows are out of the question for me , now, I am getting to old. Let me tell you they are WORK, just doing the shows. Then the people get so they want things , you have spent hours doing, for NOTHING!!
So, reading the Philly newspaper a few weks ago, I read about this web site selling ONLY HAND MADE ITEMS.
So, reading the Philly newspaper a few weks ago, I read about this web site selling ONLY HAND MADE ITEMS.
Great I thought , so I went to check it out.
Let me say right now, this is the greateast thing for crafters,,
check it out for your self, it is:::
check it out for your self, it is:::
Etsy.com
If you are a crafter , do yourself a favor and check it out,,tell your friends!
If you want to see my site and what I have listed, go to;;;;;;;;;
thewrightplace,,
just put the name in the search, then in the drop down click on "users names" it will take you right to my site.
I am telling you this not just for me but for the people who are crafters and can not afford the $25.00 or $35.00 for one days show.
I am telling you this not just for me but for the people who are crafters and can not afford the $25.00 or $35.00 for one days show.
You will be shocked at the price,,you might not beleive me , just check it out for your self,, you will be happy you did , I sure am!
Your old Auntie Francy!! REAllY just Fran!
Your old Auntie Francy!! REAllY just Fran!
Saturday, August 04, 2007
When things in your life seem almost too much to handle,when 24 Hours in a day is not enough,remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items infront of him. When the class began, wordlessly,he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the studentsif the jar was full. They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students againif the jar was full.. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full.
The students respondedwith an unanimous'yes.'
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table And poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the Empty space between the sand.
The students laughed. 'Now,' said the professor,as the laughter subsided,'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things - God, family, children, health,friends, and Favorite passions -- things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car.
The sand is everything else --the small stuff.
'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued,'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff,you will never have room forthe things that are important to you.
So... Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play With your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.
Play another 18.
There will always be time to clean the houseand fix the disposal.
'Take care of the golf balls first --the things that really matter.
Set your priorities.
The rest is just sand.'
One of the students raised her handand inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled. 'I'm glad you asked'.
It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.'
Please share this with someone you care about.
I JUST DID. Just a thought for the day~~~~~~ FRAN
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items infront of him. When the class began, wordlessly,he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the studentsif the jar was full. They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students againif the jar was full.. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full.
The students respondedwith an unanimous'yes.'
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table And poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the Empty space between the sand.
The students laughed. 'Now,' said the professor,as the laughter subsided,'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things - God, family, children, health,friends, and Favorite passions -- things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car.
The sand is everything else --the small stuff.
'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued,'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff,you will never have room forthe things that are important to you.
So... Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play With your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.
Play another 18.
There will always be time to clean the houseand fix the disposal.
'Take care of the golf balls first --the things that really matter.
Set your priorities.
The rest is just sand.'
One of the students raised her handand inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled. 'I'm glad you asked'.
It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.'
Please share this with someone you care about.
I JUST DID. Just a thought for the day~~~~~~ FRAN
Sunday, July 22, 2007
THREE NUNS WERE ATTENDING A HOCKEY GAME.
THREE MEN WERE SITTING DIRECTLY BEHIND. BECAUSE THEIR HABITS WERE PARTIALLY BLOCKING THE VIEW,
THE MEN DECIDED TO BADGER THE NUNS HOPING THAT THEY'D GET ANNOYED ENOUGH TO MOVE TO ANOTHER AREA.
IN A VERY LOUD VOICE, THE FIRST GUY SAID, "I THINK I'M GOING TO MOVE TO UTAH; THERE ARE ONLY 100 NUNS LIVING THERE."
THEN THE SECOND GUY SPOKE UP AND SAID, "I WANT TO GO TO MONTANA ; THERE ARE ONLY 5O NUNS LIVING THERE."
THE THIRD GUY SAID, "I WANT TO GO TO IDAHO ; THERE ARE ONLY 25 NUNS LIVING THERE. "
ONE OF THE NUNS TURNED AROUND,
LOOKED AT THE MEN, AND IN A VERY SWEET AND CALM VOICE SAID,
"WHY DON'T YOU GO TO HELL .
THERE AREN'T ANY NUNS THERE."
I am still laughing,, this is one of the best ones yet!!!
Where do people think of these things,,, FRAN
THREE MEN WERE SITTING DIRECTLY BEHIND. BECAUSE THEIR HABITS WERE PARTIALLY BLOCKING THE VIEW,
THE MEN DECIDED TO BADGER THE NUNS HOPING THAT THEY'D GET ANNOYED ENOUGH TO MOVE TO ANOTHER AREA.
IN A VERY LOUD VOICE, THE FIRST GUY SAID, "I THINK I'M GOING TO MOVE TO UTAH; THERE ARE ONLY 100 NUNS LIVING THERE."
THEN THE SECOND GUY SPOKE UP AND SAID, "I WANT TO GO TO MONTANA ; THERE ARE ONLY 5O NUNS LIVING THERE."
THE THIRD GUY SAID, "I WANT TO GO TO IDAHO ; THERE ARE ONLY 25 NUNS LIVING THERE. "
ONE OF THE NUNS TURNED AROUND,
LOOKED AT THE MEN, AND IN A VERY SWEET AND CALM VOICE SAID,
"WHY DON'T YOU GO TO HELL .
THERE AREN'T ANY NUNS THERE."
I am still laughing,, this is one of the best ones yet!!!
Where do people think of these things,,, FRAN
Friday, July 20, 2007
Proud to forward this to all my Jersey Girls! (And warn you Jersey Guys!)
Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had given their new wives duties.The first man had married a woman from Illinois and
had told her that she was going to do the dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days, but on the
third day he came home to see a clean house and disheswashed and put away.
The second man had married a woman from Michigan. Hehad given his wife orders that she was to do all the
cleaning, dishes, and the cooking. The first day he
didn't see any results, but the next day he saw it was
better. By the third day, he saw his house was clean,the dishes were done, and there was a huge dinner onthe table.
The third man had married a beautiful girl from NewJersey. He told her that her duties were to keep the
house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry
washed and hot meals on the table for every meal.
He said the first day he didn't see anything,
the second day he didn't see anything,
but by the third day some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye, enough to fix himself a
sandwich and load the dishwasher.
Have a great day!Keep in touch!
JUST BECAUSE I'M A JERSEY GAL,,, I THINK THIS ONE IS GREAT!!!
Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had given their new wives duties.The first man had married a woman from Illinois and
had told her that she was going to do the dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days, but on the
third day he came home to see a clean house and disheswashed and put away.
The second man had married a woman from Michigan. Hehad given his wife orders that she was to do all the
cleaning, dishes, and the cooking. The first day he
didn't see any results, but the next day he saw it was
better. By the third day, he saw his house was clean,the dishes were done, and there was a huge dinner onthe table.
The third man had married a beautiful girl from NewJersey. He told her that her duties were to keep the
house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry
washed and hot meals on the table for every meal.
He said the first day he didn't see anything,
the second day he didn't see anything,
but by the third day some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye, enough to fix himself a
sandwich and load the dishwasher.
Have a great day!Keep in touch!
JUST BECAUSE I'M A JERSEY GAL,,, I THINK THIS ONE IS GREAT!!!
Sunday, July 15, 2007
*********** The Good Husband ************
*********** *************
Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all.
He didn't even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.
Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table; and, next to them, a single red rose!
Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spot lessly clean.
So is the rest of the house.
He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror.
Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick:
"Honey, breakfast is on the stove... I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. All my love, Jillian
He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper.
His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, "Son...What happened last night?"
"Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over th e coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.
Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??"
His son replies, "Oh THAT!...
Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, I'm married!!"
Broken Coffee Table $239.99
Hot Breakfast $4.20
Two Aspirins $.38
Saying the right thing, at the right time...
PRICELESS!!!
YOU GOT TO LOVE THIS ONE!!!!!! FRAN
*********** *************
Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all.
He didn't even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.
Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table; and, next to them, a single red rose!
Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spot lessly clean.
So is the rest of the house.
He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror.
Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick:
"Honey, breakfast is on the stove... I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. All my love, Jillian
He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper.
His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, "Son...What happened last night?"
"Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over th e coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.
Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??"
His son replies, "Oh THAT!...
Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, I'm married!!"
Broken Coffee Table $239.99
Hot Breakfast $4.20
Two Aspirins $.38
Saying the right thing, at the right time...
PRICELESS!!!
YOU GOT TO LOVE THIS ONE!!!!!! FRAN
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY!!!!
Yep! I passed it on...
I'm sorry, but after hearing they want
to sing OUR National Anthem in Spanish - enough is enough!
NEVER did they sing it in Italian,
Japanese, Polish, Irish-Celtic, German, Portuguese, Greek, French, or any other language because of immigration.
It was written by Francis Scott Key and should be sung word for word the way it
was written. The news broadcasts
gave a translation that's NOT even close.
Sorry if this offends anyone, but this is
THIS IS MY COUNTRY!
Do YOU - sing MY
National Anthem in YOUR COUNTRY
IN ENGLISH ? ? ?
And, because I make this statement
DOES NOT mean I'm against immigration!!!
YOU ARE WELCOME HERE IN MY COUNTRY.
Welcome to come through like
everyone else has.
Get a sponsor !
Get a place to lay your head !
Get a job !
Live by OUR rules !
Pay YOUR taxes !
And
LEARN THE LANGUAGE
LIKE ALL OTHER IMMIGRANTS HAVE
IN THE PAST!!!
AND PLEASE DON'T DEMAND THAT WE HAND OVER OUR LIFETIME SAVINGS OF SOCIAL SECURITY FUNDS TO YOU
TO MAKE UP FOR ''YOUR'' LOSSES.
If you don't want to forward this
for fear of offending someone, then
YOU'RE PART OF THE PROBLEM!When will AMERICAN'S STOP giving away THEIR RIGHTS???
We've gone so far the other way,
bent over backwards not to
offend anyone.
But it seems no one cares about the AMERICAN
that's being offended!
WAKE UP America !!!
If you agree - pass this on... FRAN
Yep! I passed it on...
I'm sorry, but after hearing they want
to sing OUR National Anthem in Spanish - enough is enough!
NEVER did they sing it in Italian,
Japanese, Polish, Irish-Celtic, German, Portuguese, Greek, French, or any other language because of immigration.
It was written by Francis Scott Key and should be sung word for word the way it
was written. The news broadcasts
gave a translation that's NOT even close.
Sorry if this offends anyone, but this is
THIS IS MY COUNTRY!
Do YOU - sing MY
National Anthem in YOUR COUNTRY
IN ENGLISH ? ? ?
And, because I make this statement
DOES NOT mean I'm against immigration!!!
YOU ARE WELCOME HERE IN MY COUNTRY.
Welcome to come through like
everyone else has.
Get a sponsor !
Get a place to lay your head !
Get a job !
Live by OUR rules !
Pay YOUR taxes !
And
LEARN THE LANGUAGE
LIKE ALL OTHER IMMIGRANTS HAVE
IN THE PAST!!!
AND PLEASE DON'T DEMAND THAT WE HAND OVER OUR LIFETIME SAVINGS OF SOCIAL SECURITY FUNDS TO YOU
TO MAKE UP FOR ''YOUR'' LOSSES.
If you don't want to forward this
for fear of offending someone, then
YOU'RE PART OF THE PROBLEM!When will AMERICAN'S STOP giving away THEIR RIGHTS???
We've gone so far the other way,
bent over backwards not to
offend anyone.
But it seems no one cares about the AMERICAN
that's being offended!
WAKE UP America !!!
If you agree - pass this on... FRAN
Sunday, July 01, 2007

Hi Buddy
HAPPY BUDDIES DAY!!!
Forward to all your friends, including me.
And don't tell me you're too busy for this.
Don't you know the phrase "stop and smell the flowers"?
See how many "bouquets" you end up with!
Happiness Keeps You Sweet,
Trials Keep You Strong,
Sorrows Keep You Human,
Failures Keep You Humble,
Success Keeps You Glowing,
But Only God Keeps You Going!
You are so special!
Today is "Online Buddy Day".
Have a great day now, Ok.
Have a very happy and SAFE week of the FOUTH OF JULY!!!!
Friday, June 29, 2007
The day finally arrived. Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is at
the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself. However, the gates are closed,
and Forrest approaches the gatekeeper.
St. Peter said, "Well, Forrest,
it is certainly good to see you.
We have heard a lot about you. I must
tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we have been administering
an entrance examination for everyone.
The test is short, but you have to
pass it before you can get into Heaven."
Forrest responds, "It sure is
good to be here, St. Peter, sir. But nobody ever told me about any entrance
exam. I sure hope that the test ain't too hard.
Life was a big enough test
as it was."
St. Peter continued, "Yes, I
know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions.
First:
What two days of the week
begin with the letter T?
Second:
How many seconds are there in a year?
Third:
What is God's first name?"
Forrest leaves to think the questions
over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter, who waves him up, and
says, "Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over,
tell me your answers."
Forrest replied, "Well, the
first one -- which two days in the week begins with the letter "T"?
Shucks, that one is easy. That would be Today and Tomorrow."
The Saint's eyes opened wide and
he exclaimed, "Forrest, that is not what I was thinking, but you do
have a point, and I guess I did not specify, so I will give you credit
for that answer. How about the next one?" asked St. Peter.
"How many seconds in a year?
Now that one is harder," replied Forrest, "but I thunk and thunk about
that, and I guess the only answer can be twelve."
Astounded, St. Peter said, "Twelve?
Twelve? Forrest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds
in a year?"
Forrest replied, "Shucks, there's
got to be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd... "
"Hold it," interrupts St. Peter.
"I see where you are going with this, and I see your point,
though that was not quite what I had in mind....but I will have to give
you credit for that one, too. Let us go on with the third and final question.
Can you tell me God's first name"?
"Sure," Forrest replied,
"it's Andy."
"Andy?" exclaimed an exasperated
and frustrated St Peter.
"Ok, I can understand how you
came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the
world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?"
"Shucks, that was the easiest
one of all," Forrest replied. "I learnt it from the song,
ANDY WALKS WITH ME,
ANDY TALKS WITH ME,
ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN."
St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates,
and said: "Run, Forrest, run."
Give me a sense of humor, Lord.
Give me the ability to understand a clean joke,
To get some humor out of life,
And to pass it on to other folks.
GOOD OLD ,FORREST, HAD SOME REALLY GOOD ANSWERS, DIDN'T HE????,
the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself. However, the gates are closed,
and Forrest approaches the gatekeeper.
St. Peter said, "Well, Forrest,
it is certainly good to see you.
We have heard a lot about you. I must
tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we have been administering
an entrance examination for everyone.
The test is short, but you have to
pass it before you can get into Heaven."
Forrest responds, "It sure is
good to be here, St. Peter, sir. But nobody ever told me about any entrance
exam. I sure hope that the test ain't too hard.
Life was a big enough test
as it was."
St. Peter continued, "Yes, I
know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions.
First:
What two days of the week
begin with the letter T?
Second:
How many seconds are there in a year?
Third:
What is God's first name?"
Forrest leaves to think the questions
over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter, who waves him up, and
says, "Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over,
tell me your answers."
Forrest replied, "Well, the
first one -- which two days in the week begins with the letter "T"?
Shucks, that one is easy. That would be Today and Tomorrow."
The Saint's eyes opened wide and
he exclaimed, "Forrest, that is not what I was thinking, but you do
have a point, and I guess I did not specify, so I will give you credit
for that answer. How about the next one?" asked St. Peter.
"How many seconds in a year?
Now that one is harder," replied Forrest, "but I thunk and thunk about
that, and I guess the only answer can be twelve."
Astounded, St. Peter said, "Twelve?
Twelve? Forrest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds
in a year?"
Forrest replied, "Shucks, there's
got to be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd... "
"Hold it," interrupts St. Peter.
"I see where you are going with this, and I see your point,
though that was not quite what I had in mind....but I will have to give
you credit for that one, too. Let us go on with the third and final question.
Can you tell me God's first name"?
"Sure," Forrest replied,
"it's Andy."
"Andy?" exclaimed an exasperated
and frustrated St Peter.
"Ok, I can understand how you
came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the
world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?"
"Shucks, that was the easiest
one of all," Forrest replied. "I learnt it from the song,
ANDY WALKS WITH ME,
ANDY TALKS WITH ME,
ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN."
St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates,
and said: "Run, Forrest, run."
Give me a sense of humor, Lord.
Give me the ability to understand a clean joke,
To get some humor out of life,
And to pass it on to other folks.
GOOD OLD ,FORREST, HAD SOME REALLY GOOD ANSWERS, DIDN'T HE????,
Saturday, June 23, 2007
An 80-year old man goes for a physical. All of his tests come back with normal results. The doctor says, "Chuck, everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?"
Chuck replies, "God and I are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so he's fixed it so when I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, poof! the light goes on. When I'm done, poof! the light goes off."
"Wow, that's incredible." the doctor says. A little later in the day, the doctor calls Chuck's wife. "Ethel," he says, "Chuck is doing fine! But I had to call you as I am in awe of his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night and poof! the light goes on in the bathroom, and when he's done poof! the light goes off?"
"Oh my God!" Ethel exclaims. "he's peeing in the refrigerator again!"
Now I am old BUT~~~~~~~~God I hope I never get this bad!!! (laughing!!!) Fran
Chuck replies, "God and I are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so he's fixed it so when I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, poof! the light goes on. When I'm done, poof! the light goes off."
"Wow, that's incredible." the doctor says. A little later in the day, the doctor calls Chuck's wife. "Ethel," he says, "Chuck is doing fine! But I had to call you as I am in awe of his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night and poof! the light goes on in the bathroom, and when he's done poof! the light goes off?"
"Oh my God!" Ethel exclaims. "he's peeing in the refrigerator again!"
Now I am old BUT~~~~~~~~God I hope I never get this bad!!! (laughing!!!) Fran
Subject: Why You Should Shut Down Your Computer at Night
When you go to bed at night and forget to shut down your computer, I think you ought to know what actually goes on.
It's 2 A M and do you know where your icons are and what they are doing?
Click on this site and you will see what happens when you leave the computer on during the night.
(Best when viewed on a full screen)
http://www.xs4all.nl/~jvdkuyp/flash/see.htm
Make sure you have the sound on!!
When you go to bed at night and forget to shut down your computer, I think you ought to know what actually goes on.
It's 2 A M and do you know where your icons are and what they are doing?
Click on this site and you will see what happens when you leave the computer on during the night.
(Best when viewed on a full screen)
http://www.xs4all.nl/~jvdkuyp/flash/see.htm
Make sure you have the sound on!!
Friday, June 15, 2007
Defense Attorney:Will you please state your age?
Little Old Lady:I am 86 years old.
Defense Attorney:Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st? Little Old Lady:There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening,When a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.
Defense Attorney:Did you know him?
Little Old Lady:No, but he sure was friendly.
Defense Attorney:What happened after he sat down?
Little Old Lady:He started to rub my thigh.
Defense Attorney:Did you stop him?
Little Old Lady:No, I didn't stop him.
Defense Attorney:Why not?
Little Old Lady:It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 30 years ago. Defense Attorney:What happened next?
Little Old Lady:He began to rub my breasts.
Defense Attorney:Did you stop him then?
Little Old Lady:No, I did not stop him.
Defense Attorney:Why not?
Little Old Lady:His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years! Defense Attorney:What happened next?
Little Old Lady:Well, by then, I was feeling so "spicy" that I just laid down and told him"Take me, young man. Take me now!"
Defense Attorney:Did he take you?
Little Old Lady:Hell, no!
He just yelled, "April Fool!"
And that's when I shot him, the little bastard.
YOU BETTER WATCH OUT FOR THOSE LITTLE OLD LADIES!!!!!
(LAUGHING ARE YOU?) FRAN
Little Old Lady:I am 86 years old.
Defense Attorney:Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st? Little Old Lady:There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening,When a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.
Defense Attorney:Did you know him?
Little Old Lady:No, but he sure was friendly.
Defense Attorney:What happened after he sat down?
Little Old Lady:He started to rub my thigh.
Defense Attorney:Did you stop him?
Little Old Lady:No, I didn't stop him.
Defense Attorney:Why not?
Little Old Lady:It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 30 years ago. Defense Attorney:What happened next?
Little Old Lady:He began to rub my breasts.
Defense Attorney:Did you stop him then?
Little Old Lady:No, I did not stop him.
Defense Attorney:Why not?
Little Old Lady:His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years! Defense Attorney:What happened next?
Little Old Lady:Well, by then, I was feeling so "spicy" that I just laid down and told him"Take me, young man. Take me now!"
Defense Attorney:Did he take you?
Little Old Lady:Hell, no!
He just yelled, "April Fool!"
And that's when I shot him, the little bastard.
YOU BETTER WATCH OUT FOR THOSE LITTLE OLD LADIES!!!!!
(LAUGHING ARE YOU?) FRAN
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